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tomorrow

tabitha miss corinn my sister tabitha came into my room today she dropped she fell in through the ceiling that woman has amazing reflexes she fell she jumped in it seemed i was asleep but she wasn't there and then she was and she said she said i have a little more than 24 hours left this is the last day of my life i cannot believe this is happening to me i would rather stay alive alone in the room than be dead please don't let her do it

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oh god

oh god oh no oh god i hear her i hear her coming things are banging and slamming above me she is coming oh no oh no she heard she knows she knows i let frank be me oh god she's going to she's going to

NOOOOOOOOO GET AWAY

i did it i did it i drank from the lake and frank was in me he spoke to her he talked to her on that instant messenging software but he's gone now he had to go back the lake called to him it called him back and i'm tired... oh so tired so tired i can't i can't keep my eyes open any more...

please

please please can i have a pill i want a pill i want to go back to the garden i swear i swear it i swear i won't go back to the lake i just want to see the tree the tree is all i want i swear i won't see frank can i have a pill please a little silver pill the monkey the monkey is so bad i need i need to go back to the

thank you. thank you i'm going i'm going back to the place where everything smells of wildflowers and the bees buzz they buzz so pleasantly and there's the tree i see my tree my tree i climbed the tree one day did i say that i climbed it and i fell and the little boy caught me he's strong he caught me and laid me down in a bed of four-leaf clovers he laid me down and disappeared but I'm back there now and i see the tree the tree covered in blossoms i love this tree i love this tree i live for this tree for the times i can come here to the silver garden and

i did it i did it i saw frank i saw him again he was in the lake and he let me see him tabitha doesn't know she doesn't know i did it he said he said he's going to be me some time soon he said if i drink the lake if i drink him he will be in me and he will be alive again i think i think i'm gonna do it

this morning i went back back to the garden with the silver pill and the silver bees they buzzed they buzzed really loudly so i got a bad headache from them i got a really bad one it hurt it hurt and everything blanked out and i was back back in the room with the dark silver walls with no windows i was back the bees sent me back so i couldn't visit frank i think she did it i think she made the bees angry they were angry and she was angry with me they were angry with me because she told them i was bad and she didn't want me to see frank she didn't want me to know that it was her fault she was the one she was the one who told him he wants her to look in the cloud did you look in the cloud is it there did you find it frank wants you to see it he wants you to see what's in the cloud you really should see because she doesn't want you to see she doesn't so you should i don't want to i dont want to the bees the bees are going to hurt me again don't hurt me not with your needles your needles no no no no no ok ok i'll take the pill i'll take it i'll

frank says hi

i talked to him

I talked to him Frank Frank I saw Frank and yes he's dead but he says it's not so bad it's not bad in the place where he is I saw Frank Frank was in the silver garden he was in the lake in the lake that mirrors the sky so well he was there in its depths and he spoke to me he said to tell her to look in the clouds to look in the clouds for the truth i don't know what he means but he said hes sorry and to tell everyone he's sorry he said he's doing well and he misses her and he's sorry people are angry he's sorry sorry everyone did you hear katrina me did you hear me he's sorry he didn't want to do it but he said the cloud the cloud she will learn that the cloud it made him do it but he's angry he's angry because her end of the bargain didn't it didn't hold up her end of the bargain wasn't there she hasn't done what she promised so he is mad but he can't do anything because he's trapped in the Silver garden by himself well not alone he's by himself with the others in the lake he says they won't talk to him because they think he's strange he's normal and they are not they were murdered and he took his own life they resent him they don't understand why he would give up they would give anything to hang on and he wanted to let go but that's neither here nor there he says he would like to talk to me more and he was very certain he wanted me to tell her whoever she is not tabitha her he wanted her to look in the cloud because that will show her the answer it will show her what happened so her if you're out there look in the cloud frank wants you to look in the cloud i don't know what's going to happen to me because i spoke to him but i know tabitha isn't going to be happy she's going to keep me from the pills but thats ok i saw him i saw him and i liked it and he knew i was alive and he liked it and he said she should look in the look in the cloud for the truth

dead?!?!

NO! NO! He can't be dead! Tabitha was lying he can't have killed himself that's not that's not good that's not fair no no no no no frank frank don't be dead please if you're out there please please don't be dead she didn't mean it she didn't mean to do that to you you don't have to kill yourself she's lying isn't she she's lying she's lying she lies! She lies and she knows it and i do too but what if she isn't what if she's telling the truth frank are you really dead are you really out there in the spirit world hey maybe i can maybe i can... i can...

Pill? Pill, PLEASE?

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help me they say they're going to celebrate with me i dont' want to celebrate rabm rug 3.23 that's not going to happen i will fight i will fight katrina will rise up and fight against them they are bad they are bad they are going to hurt me to hurt me to take I don't want to go to their birthday party that's not going to work for me it's not going to happen vudofo yourself i don't want to i don't want

this morning I saw him again the boy the boy was there again he was sitting on the bench just like before and he told me he said he told me that they were going to have a feast to celebrate his birth him but not him the boy but not the boy they were going to feast a feast i haven't eaten anything but bread and water since god knows how long but they're having a feast a feast and they want us to come but the boy said the four-leaf clover isn't letting him come it's calling to him it's calling him to the lake the pool to the lake that mirrors the sky oh so ever perfectly and the clover wants him to bathe so i said the lake is good the lake will let you bathe it's a good lake i am good i swear i'll be good i'm a good girl katrina me she is a good girl a good good girl i won't be bad i can feast i can eat if you want me her me to i can eat i can eat lotsa foods like an elephant hehe i can be an elephant if it makes you not hurt me any more don't don't don't

i dont want to

no i dont want to please dont make me please dont i dont want to do that with i dont want to go there anymore there's someone in the water in the water in the lake in the i dont know what to do i dont want to i'll be good i'll be

they did it. they made me take the pill i am going back back to the silver garden back back they're making me go

last night

last night i was bad i was bad katrina was a bad girl and miss tabitha was not happy not happy at all she was not happy she came and she hurt me she hurt me real real bad real real real bad she stabbed me in the heart with the needles and i've been asleep asleep really asleep in the garden asleep with the boy he came again he came while I was asleep katrina was snoring and the boy came he came and i saw him in the lake in my dream but tabitha was not happy not happy at all she hurt me she hurt me because i was bad i talked to someone i dont know how but they were there they talked to me i talked to them and she found out she didn't like it so i got hurt real bad i sorry katrina sorry i sorry i am katrina i am she she is i and all that i am so sorry i was bad tabby be nice dont hurt me any more i will be good from

back off

stay away stay away how dare you oh god no stay away from me don't don't do it don't do that to her to me i am she stay away get away from me you bitch you how dare you come at me like how dare you do that to Katrina?!

can i help you

are you afraid? what do you want please dont cry i will help you we will go together to bathe to bathe in the pool of forgotten sorrows together i will take you don't cry i don't like it when little boys cry it makes my heart break as much as when my sister tabitha stabs me with her never mind you don't need to know about that you don't need to hear my sob story and you dont need to sob let's go let's go together to the pool and you can bathe your fears away we're ok we're together and we're ok no need to cry it's going to be ok why are you why are you fading disappearing are you still can you hear me are you there where are you where are you going fading away dont go i was just starting to just starting to get you moving up off the bench which sucks away your time and your soul and your life it is bad the bench is bad i know but the pool is good the pool will help it will help well goodbye then goodbye little boy may we meet again some

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

tired... i feel so sleepy...

last night i met a boy in the garden a boy there was a boy in the garden on the bench i think he was on the bench he told me told me someone was coming to save me to get me out of this room to save me and him he said we would be saved but i dont know who the boy was he might have been bad he might not have been good maybe he maybe he wanted to hurt me to hurt me like tabitha did to hurt me with needles with needles with his voice and his hand and needles what if he wanted to hurt me maybe i shouldnt go with someone who says they're here to save me to save me and get me away maybe they're working with the boy the boy on the bench who might not be good

oh i dont know what to do oh god oh god why did this happen to me i shouldn't have listened to tabitha and gone to frank i shouldn't have frank why why what who who is frank i dont know what these things mean but they're in my head they're in my head and i don't know what they mean how can i figure this out i don't understand dont get it dont know why who is frank who is i i am she katrina me not tabitha katrina me i am she and guess what she is i

itmf u eqq

i'm walking through the garden
the path leads to a bench
and i can sense the faint image of someone here, someone here before me
what were they doing as they sat here?
i don't know
i'll never know
but i move on and now i see the treee
the tree
the tree
of knowledge and truth
i see it here
i see it
and it calls to me
i sit among its roots
and think
about the time that has passed
the time i've been alone
without sun
without sun
without life
the silver garden is the only place
where i can breathe fresh air
not this oxygen gas
the fresh air
i move on
the tree
i follow the string
i see the next rock
i see it
and i sit
again someone else has been here
a young person
a boy
a boy
a boy has been here
what is he doing
i don't know
i'll never know
but he was here
so now i move on from the rock
but before I go i see
i see
i see something in the shadows
it's a piece of paper
it says PLEH
the sound of
the sound of someone vomiting
oh well
i'll never know
i move on...

no no no not ever never again

It's really bad to hear your voice saying my name it sounds so ugly coming from the lips of the Devil hearing those words it makes me weaK and i, wanna say goodbye but mime you make it hard to be good with the lips of the devil but mystery person you make it hard to be good with the lips of the devil

Time

i don't know how long i've been here and i don't know how long i'll stay
but i do know i want to leave and i dont want to last another day
so i'm thinking that if i dont leave soon
i'm going to take my life
I don't want to live here much longer
and pretend to be like this

the pills are great when they come but when they dont things are bad
she hurts me she hurts me she hurts me real bad
i dont want to live any longer
she says i'm dead so why not?

a pill? thanks...

Silver garden silver garden with the bees and the grave the grave why is there a cross on the ground a grave what is this maybe i should dig it up to see who's buried here and look look a grave is here why a grave what should i oh honey honey tastes so good i love this honey thank you, serpent thank you for the fruit fruit the pomegranite tastes oh so delicious thank you thank you for not hurting me tabitha thank you for the pill i'll be good I'll be good I'll be KATRINA good I'll be good if I can just have some more pomegranite seeds the seeds keep me in this hell the little silver seeds the pills the pills take me to the silver seeds ground pomegranite good she is i i am she im shesheisi

come sail away to the silver garden where the air is fresh and we'll beg your pardon

I'm sailing away, set an open course for the virgin sea
I've got to be free, free to face the life that's ahead of me
On board, I'm the captain, so climb aboard
We'll search for tomorrow on every shore
And I'll try, oh Lord, I'll try to carry on

Do You See

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back to the silver garden

i see the bees now buzzing loudly and the smell of oh look a seraph a beautiful seraph smell of the flowers the smell of the flowers and the garden the fruit the wonderful fruit from the tree the tree the silver garden box the needle comes from the juice of the fruit what what is this why am i falling asleep why am i so tir hpxsgosexxagnbauslgokspw

back to the garden i go!

oh, a pill? thank you very much

know...

i disagree. i don't think i'm dead. know this, everyone i am alive i am she she is i imshesheisi I AM KATRINA KATRINA ISN'T DEAD

haha

youre funny

rhahaitscqsqc

iwantthepills i want the pills i will take the pills if i want the pills dont tell me not to take the pills the pills are good they take me to the silver garden to the silver box garden needle silver silver silver i am hurt why don't the pills hurt me if the pills hurt me then why shouldnt i take them sylvia who are you anyway and how did you get inside my box oh sorry tabitha i shouldnt be mean to sylvia do you know sylvia no you dont ok never mind then slyvia leave me alone i can make my own decisions about the pills i want the pills to make my own decisions about them the pills make decisions for me decisions sylvia decisions i want the pills because they are good and i like them so I WANT THEM. Thank you for the pill strange hand in the ceiling strange person strange strange mysterious person who gives me food in the haze in the darkness the haze the silver haze the sounds in the

Frank Dawes? I dont know any Frank Dawes what are you talking about that name means nothing to me nothing i tell you nothing dont' tell me about frank dawes i will take the i am katrina the pills are good and frank dawes the name is bad the name the name in the

mischief

haha tonight is the night the night when they will come in the haze to my room and throw toilet paper on my needles the long silver needles i am they will come and don't hurt me please oh its just mischief ok i don't need to worry katrina my name is you can come and help me get through the haze can't you why wont you hurt me help me why cant you do something good for once instead of mischief mischief is good mischief is bad why why why do you have to make mischief me sad i am who is these sounds in the needles the long silver box in the coffin the ground i was in the ground oh god im remembering i was in the ground why was i in a box in the silver needle... pill? oh thank you. i needed this pill this pill this wonderful vehicle to the silver gar- needle, box, garden, it's all the same i'm starting to forget again, it's just words on the computer silver box i dont really remember being underground i made it up didn't i didn't i am i didn't i didn't i didn't i swear i didn't please don't hurt me tabby please dont do this.

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tat sounds good to me you can pok me with your siver needles i'll let you its ok you can kee me in this hell i dont care any more thank you thank you for (hurting) telling me everything tabitha i don't care anymore it doesn't really matter you can hurt me some more i'll be good please dont hurt me just leave me alone and i'll be good i swear it i swear it i swear it on the crow i swear it on our grandfather's grave i'll be good as long as you keep giving me that pill the one that made me dream of sunflowers and (the long boy) the thing with the flowers and the bees and that place where everything is nice i want the pill some more tabby give me the pill please i'll be good i swear it you can hurt me i dont care anymore i katrina plessing dont care dont katrina dont hurt me dont come in the mist any more dont make me wait for the pill tabitha you love me dont you you love me tabby you love me tabby you love me tabitha you love me i love you too i love you i love you frank tabitha i love you i always have even when you hurt me hurt me with your needles and the pill, please, please, give me the fucking pill do it for me do it for me do it for our mother and for me the pill tabby where are you please give me the pill i will let you poke me with your needles let you rip a hole in my arm as the saying is please i want to go to the place that smells of hollyhocks please i want to go i want to go get me out of here someone i want to go to that place where the pill takes me to the

oh my god i hear them i hear them laughing they are so loud why are they laughing so loud i cant take it any more tabitha my god why did you do this hurt me to me so bad even in the haze i am hurt the silver box needles hurt me so bad on the black tray letters you hurt me so bad i cant do this much longer my god tabitha dont do this dont do this dont do laughing why are they laughing what is so funny i want to know i want to know i want you to tell me i want you to go away don't come here anymore youre not welcome here oh god dont laugh please make them leave i cant take it any more the needles the long silver (sleep) needles they hurt my arms my name is you hurt me so fucking bad why oh my why katrina plessing frank dawes why do you frank dawes my hurt me name is not frank plessing you are hurting me stop laughing stop. i'll scream there i go i'm hurt screaming i'm screaming so loud and i'll never stop stay away from me haze me hurt me why did you hurt me i wont stop screaming until you tell me who i am and who is in the ceiling with the needles the food who drops the food through the hole in the end of the needle hurts me stop stop laughing stop hurting me the laughers share their joke of insanity but i want to know my name what is so funny KATRINA PLESSING IM SCREAMING AND ILL NEVER STOP DAMN IT NEVER!

no

tkscs wsio ymyzvv zchhlvv vose sp lr pue ds wij auc rq u fhve

they came to me last night in the darnkess in the haze they came and they laughed high pitched laughs that echoed off the haze the walls their high laughs at nothing came to me even in the haze she hurt their laughs were so high so insane i wonder are they real or is it me in the haze who is insane they came and they poked me with long silver (boxes) needles they poked me with needles and they put something in my in my arm in the haze in my arm it hurt oh god she hurt it hurt me bad their needles hurt me she hurt me bad tabitha why are you doing this to me tabitha what is what is happening to me why does it hurt so bad and why are they laughing stop laughing stop the fucking laughing i dont want to hear your laughter any more you laugh even in the haze even in the darkness the darkness i am she she am Katrina Dawes Katrina Jakob Plessing Dawes Frank why am i doing this who am i what is happening to me why are they laughing stop it stop hurting me stop it stop it stop please please stop laughing!!!!

she hurt me real bad oh god she hurt me bad

alive i am alive i am alive i am alive i am alive i am alive i tell you i live she lies she lies i live i am alive i am she she is i am katrina plessing and don't you forget it i am alive damn you i am ALIVE.

amsmuoodekfdhbcmrpgoxkoltjnsytbxiho

i sit in the corner of my little cell and i wonder how i got into this hell what is going on with me where is she where is she who is he why am i here and why doesn't this computer (large silver box black buttons on a black tray) work for anything other than this blog am I made to go insane does she (she? he and me in the haze) want me to go crazy trying to get information i am katrina plessing who is katrina plessing she is me i am she why am i here who put me here what is happening who is it that drops food in from a hole in the ceiling why are they up there why are they keeping me hidden what is going on here who is he how do i know him who is he who is he who who is who who WHO IS FRANK DAWES?!!?! why is he in my head get out out of my head i don't know you stay out of my head go away don't come to me at night don't tell me things about what used to be i don't know you please leave me alone please go away i don't want to see you in the haze anymore when the haze comes please let it be empty please please leave me alone don't don't come here anymore who are you anyway and how do i please don't hurt me tabitha please leave me alone i don't want to do this anymore. this is bad i'll do whatever you want just please don't come in the mist and tell me why the silver box doesn't work right i want answers damn you who am i and why am i here who is katrina she is i i am she she am is katrina plessing who is i am she is

a flash of fire a flash of fire the burst of flame flash fire flame what is this why is it in my head these sounds even in the fire these sounds in the haze of the fire his name why do i know his name what is this fire and why do i see it in the darkness in the fire in the flame in his name

the silver box

the computer can only do this one thing this one thing this blog. why is it like this why can i only write my thoughts to the world why can't i search for him for his name? why can't i look for ways to hold back the haze to keep him from coming to me from hurting me from making me cry. why can't why can't why can't i why stop the haze? please help me. do you know me?

when

i'm alone in the room with nothing but a computer and his name. his name. he the one who comes to me in darkness in the haze why is he here who is he what am i doing here? where am i? why can't I remember anything? time seems to stretch, to bend, to fold in on itself. i have been here for years, for days, for decades i tell you for centuries, for hours and minutes. why why am i here. who am i?

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funny innit

funny how sometimes you can wake up in a strange room with no memory of who you are or why you have a name on your lips. I know my name and I know his but of our past and how i know him i have no idea. who is he and why does he come to me in the dark?

i see

These visions flash through my head.
Passing, glimspes, in the darkness, in the haze.

What am I seeing?

What does it mean?

Where... when is this?

why

umber whunnnn
yerrrnnn umber whunnnn
fayunnnn
These sounds: even in the haze